The latest information on the perversion from Penn State opened some old wounds. Or wounds I was covering up since 1981. It's kind of strange that even with all the Catholic Priest perverts that the Catholic church backed and covered up and the original discussion of Jerry Sandusky taking advantage of boys, I still didn't open up to what happened to me. Perhaps because there seems to be some form of justice in the Sandusky/Paterno/Penn State crimes maybe is the reason I feel able to open up on this.
In the summer of 1981 I was 18 going on 19. Something important was going to happen in that one of my brothers was going to get married and I was supposed to be in the wedding party. For some reason, the Catholic church or maybe this Catholic priest (and if I remembered the bastards name I would put it all over this blog) wanted to have meetings with the wedding party--regularly. I didn't think anything of it until he grabbed my crotch and squeezed my ass and told me he "couldn't wait to get me alone". I wasn't a hulk of a teenager and told the priest to back off. But, he didn't. At any chance this pervert tried to put his hand on my private areas if he felt he could get away with it. He would make "big shows" in public on how he "loved everyone so much" that he had to hug them and when he "hugged me" he always had to try to squeeze something and tell me how much "I wanted it". Now, I would look like a big ass if I refused to "hug" the priest that "everybody loved".
Well, you know what. After a few times, I did refuse to hug this perverted bastard and he suggested to my brothers future in-laws that I needed personal counseling with him, privately. That is how evil these predators are. They know all the games and tricks. They know what kind of power they have and they realize that they are mostly untouchable and they will get what they want and if they don't at least they will get away with their crimes. But, those who are victimized are treated as outcasts and criminals.
When I was asked about not "hugging" the predator priest, I told my brother's future in-laws how their "loveable" pastor was groping me. The future in-laws response was that I really was sick and did need the pastors help (the in-laws were "good Catholics" by the way). Pretty slick of the sociopathic priest in an attempt to get me into his one-on-one "counseling sessions".
Now, one thing I didn't do right away is let my brother know what this perverted priest was doing. Why? Because my brother probably would have killed this fucker and I didn't want my brother going to jail. But after witnessing this priest "work his magic" to make me look like some sick teenager who needed his counseling and getting my brothers future in-laws to believe in it, I went to my brother and told him what happened. My brother was pissed off, but we agreed he would first warn and then, if it continued, go further. (BTW--I knew my brothers future in-laws for at least two years before all this occurred. So, they really had to block out who I was to believe I was lying to them). My brother talked to the priest once and he stayed away from me the rest of the time we had to be in a room together. Although, the priest would stare at me throughout the following meetings and if I looked up, he would wink at me.
Well, the wedding date came and went and I haven't seen or thought of that evil fucker since, until this past week. This past week I wondered how many other boys and teenagers did this sociopathic predator victimize. I felt really guilty (which the Catholics make you feel really guilty about almost anything) because maybe I could have prevented this sick bastard from victimizing anyone else. And the answer is I truly don't know and I truly doubt in 1981 that the Catholic Church or the local police would have done anything to this sick fucker or all the other sick Catholic priests that we found out were abusing boys and teenagers for years. They probably would have put me into one-on-one counseling with the guy.
When you have people in positions of power and privilege abusing those who don't, that is sick and should be stopped at all costs. When a system is created to support and protect those in power and privilege at all costs, you have a sick system. Either you need to change the system or you end up with a lot of victims or you wait until it's too late and the system collapses. I hope that system collapses, they don't deserve to survive. That's how I feel about it.
No comments:
Post a Comment